You’ll Always Wonder, But You’ll Never Know

“Heeeey! alright what's up with this perfection anyway? 
Who really is perfect?
Show me one person that is perfect.
Maybe M.I”

“Imperfect Me” by M.I Abaga

The number one thing that keeps people stuck is their obsession with being perfect.

Yup! I said what I said.

I myself have spent my whole life waiting for the perfect time for everything. The perfect time to start, to speak out, to do. Unfortunately, it’s never come. Not once.

Why do I feel like I have to make sure everything I do is “oh so perfect!”?

But I’ve come to realize that what holds me back is fear. Many times, I hesitate to share my work due to fear. I justify this hesitation as ‘perfectionism’, which provides a seemingly valid excuse to delay putting my work out there.

I say:

“I’m just waiting to have so and so equipment”
“My design just isn’t there yet”
“I’m still learning how to edit videos”
“My grammar isn’t perfect”

I justify my excuses by comparing my-unformed-self with people who have achieved perfection already.

“Some have no imperfection 
They never need correction 
Never ask for direction 
They're number one selection”

I forget that these people have had their own time of imperfection, especially at the beginning of whatever it is they’re doing. I expect to start at the same level of perfection they’ve already achieved. And when I see that I’m not as perfect, I shrink away and I stop pushing myself.

I say I want my work to be perfect that’s why I’m waiting but deep down I know what my problem really is.

It’s the fear that people won’t really like my stuff, or worse, that they’ll think I don’t have it at all, that I don’t have what it takes to be seen as creative.

Sometimes, it’s also the fear of realizing that I may need to quit something I started because doing it made me realize I don’t want to do it. I don’t know if you understand what I mean?

“Me I have plenty fracas 
Among the sheep, I'm blackest 
Mr procrastination 
I fall to much temptation”

I envy the people who are bold enough to try new things, the people who are bold enough to quit when it doesn’t work out. The ones that keep trying even though they keep failing, the ones that don’t let criticisms of others stop them from trying.

This was supposed to be me this year oh! Ughhh 😩 Thank God there’s still enough time 🙏🏾.

I just need to keep reminding myself that I don’t need to set the world on fire with my first try. In fact, not even with my first ten tries. I just have to start, and then keep at it. Eventually, I’ll get good enough at some point, …right?

As for the need to quit, my boyfriend always says “if it’s not the thing, it’ll be the thing that’ll lead you to the thing”. This quote makes me laugh a lot, quite more than it should because it’s not exactly supposed to be funny, but I guess that’s why it’s hard to forget it.

So what if I need to quit? At least I know tried it out. I just realized it’s not my thing. And my path will get clearer, ‘cus it just means that’s one less thing to do.

So, dearest gentle reader, (lol)

Stop debating whether you should do that thing and just start already! You’ve researched enough. You have planned and prepared. It’s fine. Do that thing you’ve been procrastinating on. Start now.

Stop using perfection as an excuse for not starting.

Your first try may be bad (or good), but it’s just the first. You will have more opportunities to do better, to become better. And even if you were great on your first try, you’ll still get better! So win-win. 🤷‍♀️

If you don’t try, you’ll always always wonder “what could’ve been?”, but you’ll never know.

So silence the “what ifs”. Try.

With love,
Tega💗

Are you curious about the song I referenced? Here’s a link to it: Imperfect Me – M. I Abaga

Check it out and tell me what you think about it in the comment section below! 😬

Also, share your thoughts in the comments. Any additional perspectives on what I talked about? I’d love to hear them! 💬💬💬